Thought you ought to know.

Hello :) Has been a busy few weeks, what with starting TAFE and all that. I'm enjoying it. Just read Jessie's awesome blog of a uni glossary, which you can read here (but please come back when you're done!), so I thought I'd write my own glossary for TAFE Design Center Enmore....


General 

A, B, C, D, E: The 5 sections into which the campus is divided. Referred to in the classroom numbers, ie, D208, E109, and A12. General knowledge of where each of these sections are located is necessary for getting to class on time. New students are advised to turn up 5 to 10 minutes early to ensure punctual arrival.

Campus Map: See, "Lost and Found" 

Early, The: What one calls a class that starts before their preferred wake-up time. Students are frequently late to said classes.
 
I'm-Just-Not-a-Morning-Person: The student who attempts to trade timetables with someone else without a reasonable excuse; it's just, they don't like arriving at 8am.

Lost and Found: All the stuff that you just can't find. The bathrooms, the classroom, the library, the student association room, the loose lunch money somewhere in your bag, your timetable, the website your teacher recommended.... Students are advised to look on the campus map to find some of these things. But where is the campus map?

Student Share: The large file accessible from every computer on campus. Useful for storing your work and getting briefs from teachers. Not so useful when a kindly student decides to delete your work, or a teacher decides to clear the share. See "USB" for better advise.

USB: Refers to a portable flash drive necessary for ensuring your work is safe. Useful for taking work to a from class. Students are advised to bring one to classes.

15-minute break, The: 15 minutes is a terrible between-class break length. Sure, it's enough time to heat up your leftovers in the student room's microwave and look around at the event posters in said room while you eat, but what do you do with the remaining 5 minutes? The student is often left wandering up and down staircases waiting for class to begin and looking awkward, lost, and/or suspicious, not having enough time to go up to the library and print things or check out books. An ideal break would be 10 or 30 minutes.


Teachers

And-That's-It-See-You-Next-Week: The teacher who explains what class will be about in the first 15 minutes, then gives you the next 2 hours to complete the task. Pros - class tasks are simple, so the student should not have excessive homework. Cons: The class is completely silent for those 2 hours, and the student may feel discomfort due to being unable to move in their chair for fear it will squeak too loud.

Cleverly Clueless, The: This teacher can often be found starting class precisely on time, or even possibly early. Knowingly teaching the most boring class of the week, this teacher attempts to liven things up by avoiding the whiteboard/chalkboard and using a Powerpoint instead. They may think their methods are clever, and they may give you good study tips, but it can become difficult to trust all a teacher says when he cannot set up his own Powerpoint. Worse still when he leaves the room to use the photocopiers, and a kindly student plugs his laptop into the projector for him so it will work. Upon his arrival back, stating that the photocopiers aren't working, you can't help but wonder if he had the same problem with the copiers as he did with the projector. Proceeded by a 2 and half hour Powerpoint presentation accompanied by said teacher's droning voice.

Have-a-Good-Weekend: The teacher who is well aware this is your very last class of the week and you're just dying to get home as soon as the two hours in his room are up. He won't let you get away with slacking off. You'll leave class with the twice the amount of homework you came in with.

Mr. First Name: The teacher who is generally friendly and willing to help you out with anything you can't quite get your head around. Too bad it's not your favorite subject.

Mr. Lozenge: The teacher who clears his throat between every sentence. "As you can see, *hmmm*, when I click this, the rulers come up around your page. *humm hmmmm* And when you drag from here you can get guidelines to help you create a perfect square." This becomes incredibly irritating after the first class.

Warden, The: Named after the most dangerous character in Holes, the Head Teacher's real name is omitted from this glossary because either a) the glossary writer does not know it, or b) the Head Teacher's name is rarely uttered among other teachers and hence is taboo. And she is rarely seen on campus. Students are to beware the day they must book an appointment to see the Head Teacher about a class problem. No one ever speaks about what goes on in her office. And sometimes, students don't come out....

You-Can-Call-Me-Simon: This teacher is the one who tries to pretend he's 25, not 35. He writes a list of class rules called the Ten Commandments, and if you break one, you owe him a beer. He'll crack the occasional joke, most frequently about something to do with the class subject, so new students will smile and nod and pretend they know exactly what he's talking about. He riddles his speech with keyboard shortcuts and if you don't take notes on what he writes on the board, you're a goner. Luckily, this teacher is not opposed to repeating something he's already said. As long as you're not afraid to ask questions, and you can understand when he's kidding and when he's not, you'll fit right in. For those who are afraid to ask questions, or those who missed a joke, you have 24 hours to learn all the keyboard shortcuts before the next class....